Overcoming
hate

1. Meet people

Prejudice shrinks when people really meet. It works best when they meet as equals, do something together, and have the support of people they respect, like a head teacher, an imam, a vicar or a rabbi. Facts help a little. What helps most is feeling less nervous and starting to care. Once you have shared a meal with someone, "them" becomes a name.

Try this today: pick one date from the calendar, such as Mitzvah Day in November or an open iftar in Ramadan, and say yes to it. Bring a friend.

Sources

• Pettigrew & Tropp 2006, "A meta-analytic test of intergroup contact theory", Journal of Personality and Social Psychology 90(5): 515 studies, about 250,000 people in 38 nations; contact reliably goes with lower prejudice, and works beyond race and ethnicity. link
• Pettigrew & Tropp 2008, "How does intergroup contact reduce prejudice? Meta-analytic tests of three mediators", EJSP 38: reducing anxiety and building empathy matter more than gaining knowledge. link
• Lemmer & Wagner 2015, EJSP 45: meta-analysis of real-world (not lab) contact interventions; both direct and indirect contact reduce ethnic prejudice, and effects persist. link
• Caveat: Paluck, Green & Green, "The contact hypothesis re-evaluated", Behavioural Public Policy (2018 online; 2019 print): stronger studies show smaller effects. Measure, don't assume. link
• UK schools: University of Kent evaluation of The Linking Network's Schools Linking, 2024/25 (Cameron, Kemp & Horn, 2026), 664 teacher responses from 200+ schools: teachers who thought pupils understood the lives of children from different backgrounds rose from 15.9% to 78.1%; 86.7% strongly agreed pupils were more comfortable mixing by the end of the year. Teacher-reported, not a controlled trial. link

2. A friend of a friend

You don't always have to meet first. Just knowing that a friend has a Muslim or Jewish friend can soften how you feel. Even imagining a friendly chat helps, if you rarely get the chance to meet. A likeable person on TV who lives their faith can work like a neighbour you see every week.

Try this today: share one true story of a friendship across faiths with someone who has never had one. It could be your own story, or a film from our "Neighbours" shelf.

Sources

• Wright, Aron, McLaughlin-Volpe & Ropp 1997, "The extended contact effect", JPSP 73(1). link
• Crisp & Turner 2009, "Can imagined interactions produce positive perceptions?", American Psychologist 64(4). link
• Schiappa, Gregg & Hewes 2005, "The Parasocial Contact Hypothesis", Communication Monographs 72(1). link
• Banas, Bessarabova & Massey 2020, "Meta-Analysis on Mediated Contact and Prejudice", Human Communication Research 46. link
• The Mo Salah effect: Alrababa'h, Marble, Mousa & Siegel 2021, "Can Exposure to Celebrities Reduce Prejudice? The Effect of Mohamed Salah on Islamophobic Behaviors and Attitudes", APSR 115(4): after Salah joined Liverpool, Merseyside hate crimes fell about 16% against a synthetic comparison, and Liverpool fans' anti-Muslim tweets roughly halved. link

3. Step in safely: the five Ds

Most people want to help when they see someone picked on. But they freeze, or think someone else will act. Having a simple plan in your head makes it much more likely you will help. None of these steps means facing anyone down.

• Distract: interrupt. Ask the time, drop something, or start chatting to the person being targeted.
• Delegate: get help from a bus driver, shop staff or security. Call 999 if anyone is in danger.
• Document: if someone is already helping and you are safe, film it. Give the film to the person targeted. Never post it online without their say-so.
• Delay: afterwards, check on them. "Are you OK? That wasn't right."
• Direct: speak up, calmly and briefly, but only if it is safe.

Your safety, and theirs, comes first. (Some police forces call "Delay" "Defer". It means the same thing: help afterwards.)

Report it afterwards. In England, Wales and Northern Ireland you can report online to True Vision, the police's own hate crime website: report-it.org.uk. Your report goes to your local police. See "Who to call" below for more.

Try this today: learn the five Ds (it takes two minutes) and save report-it.org.uk in your phone.

Sources

• Fischer et al. 2011, "The bystander-effect: A meta-analytic review on bystander intervention in dangerous and non-dangerous emergencies", Psychological Bulletin 137(4): the "someone else will help" effect is real but weaker in clearly dangerous situations, where people are more likely to act. link
• The 5 Ds were popularised by Hollaback!, now Right To Be (righttobe.org; the site returned 403 to our scripts).
• UK versions: Neighbourhood Watch (Our Watch), "The 5Ds of Bystander Intervention", including "never post it online or use it without their permission" and "your safety and that of the person being harassed come first". link
• Avon and Somerset Police, "Be an upstander, not a bystander": Direct, Distract, Delegate, Defer ("take action later … or making an online crime report") and Document, and points to bystander training. link Conflict to note: police use "Defer" where Right To Be uses "Delay"; same idea (act afterwards).
• Report afterwards: True Vision, link (police-funded; all strands); CST for antisemitism; British Muslim Trust for anti-Muslim hate (R12).

4. Put the truth first

Repeating a myth to knock it down can make it stick harder. So lead with the truth. Mention the myth just once, with a warning. Explain the trick it uses. Then finish with the truth again. People call this a "truth sandwich". Even better, show people the tricks before they meet them. This is called "prebunking", and it helps people spot the tricks for themselves.

Try this today: next time you put something right online, start and end with the true sentence. Mention the false one only once.

Sources

• Lewandowsky, Cook, Ecker et al., The Debunking Handbook 2020: Fact (state the truth first, if it's clear and sticky) → Myth (warn that a myth is coming; mention it only once) → Fallacy (explain how it misleads) → Fact (repeat the truth, ideally with an alternative explanation). link
• Lewandowsky, Ecker, Seifert, Schwarz & Cook 2012, "Misinformation and Its Correction", Psychological Science in the Public Interest 13(3). link
• Prebunking: Roozenbeek, van der Linden, Goldberg, Rathje & Lewandowsky 2022, "Psychological inoculation improves resilience against misinformation on social media", Science Advances 8(34): short videos exposing manipulation techniques (scapegoating, false dichotomies) improved people's ability to spot them, including in a YouTube field study. link

5. Listen first

Arguments rarely change minds. Kind conversations sometimes do. In one method, a volunteer listens without judging. They ask the other person about a time they needed kindness, and then share a story of their own. Ten-minute talks like this have changed views for months. Imagining life in someone else's shoes, for example in a role-play game, can also help for weeks.

These studies come from the USA and Hungary and looked at other kinds of prejudice. They show that the method works: swapping stories and listening well. They can't promise how big the change will be for faith hate in the UK.

Try this today: ask someone who sees Muslims, Jews or Christians differently from you, "What has your experience been?" Then listen for five minutes without correcting them.

Sources

• Broockman & Kalla 2016, "Durably reducing transphobia: A field experiment on door-to-door canvassing", Science 352(6282): a single 10-minute perspective-taking conversation reduced prejudice, with effects lasting at least three months. link
• Kalla & Broockman 2020, "Reducing Exclusionary Attitudes through Interpersonal Conversation: Evidence from Three Field Experiments", APSR 114(2): the non-judgemental exchange of narratives was the active ingredient (towards immigrants and trans people). link
• Simonovits, Kézdi & Kardos, "Seeing the World Through the Other's Eye: An Online Intervention Reducing Ethnic Prejudice", APSR (online 2017; print 2018): an online perspective-taking game reduced anti-Roma prejudice among Hungarian young adults, lasting at least a month. link
• Caution: these are US and Hungarian studies on other groups. They support the method (story exchange, non-judgemental listening), not a promised size of effect for religious prejudice in the UK.

6. What UK schools and charities do

• The Linking Network (charity 1163901): Four questions for pupils: Who am I? Who are we? Where do we live? How do we all live together? Year-long class linking with a face-to-face day. Website
• The Faith & Belief Forum (charity 1173369): School linking, speakers of different beliefs, university programmes: meet the person, ask questions. Website
• HOPE Unlimited Charitable Trust (charity 1013880): Anti-hate education and research (the charity behind HOPE not hate's education work). Website
• Tim Parry Johnathan Ball Foundation for Peace (charity 1048990): Non-violence for young people, built on the Warrington bombing story; support for survivors of terrorism. Website
• Anne Frank Trust UK (charity 1003279): Challenging prejudice through Anne Frank's diary; young ambassadors. Website
• Holocaust Educational Trust (charity 1092892): Lessons from Auschwitz: students become ambassadors and teach others. Website

All of these do three things. They help people meet. They let them hear a real person's story. And they give them something to do together. They also make the first meeting feel safe. That is our plan too: watch, then meet, then do.